So, I’m 51 today and as I look
back, as I tend to do on the milestone of my Birthday, I think what a good year
it was. Yeah, a pretty, darn good year.
Here are some of the good things
that happened this past year:
1. I had my
gallbladder removed. I hadn’t realized how badly I was suffering with that,
until it was removed and then, Wow! What a difference. Pain free. And the drugs
made my back not hurt for two whole weeks. It was good.
2. I finished
my book and started sending it out to literary agents and publishers.
Re-editing my book took forever as I kept writing new sections or completely
re-writing others, but, finally, it was done. And although I haven’t gotten an
agent or a publisher yet, I’ve gotten some great feedback and encouragement
from both.
3. I got a job.
After taking two years off, (that really only should have been one), I found a
job that I love. My boss is great, the work is challenging, I work from home
and set my own schedule, and, most importantly, I learned a lot about myself in
the process.
4. Ireland. The
mission trip I took this summer was an amazing time. I fell in love with
Ireland and her people and long for it in ways that surprise me. We had a
Sunday picnic on the lush grounds of Muckross House that was so beautiful, so
relaxing, and so full of fellowship, that in times of stress I think on it and
that wonderful feeling of contentment comes flooding over me.
5. My
relationship with God has deepened. I joined a home fellowship, I attended the spring
Women’s Bible study on Tuesday mornings, I signed up to serve in a few
ministries, and, surprise! When you feed the Spirit, the relationship you have
with God deepens. And I have met some truly amazing people. Bonus!
As great as the year has been,
there have been a few downers as well, and they are worth mentioning, if only
to see how I have grown through them.
1. I’m still
single. This one has been difficult as I dated a few people who ultimately
moved on to others. And that part I am okay with…here’s why: I’m not going to
be rushed in to anything. A friend set me up with a really nice guy who had
lost his wife two years ago. And he was ready, like right now, to move on. I
recognized he hadn’t dealt with his grief and pulled back a little, and bam.
Three months later he was married to someone else. “That could have been you,”
my friend said. “Thank God it’s not me!” I answered. They are now separated and
his words of, “I can’t believe I found love again so soon!” haunt him. Cuz, it wasn't love. It was 'thank god I'm no longer alone'. It’s
hard to wait for the right person, but I am determined to do so and to not let
my singleness or loneliness make me make a decision I will regret. The only
thing worse than being single is being married to the wrong guy. And please
stop thinking that because I am single, anybody is better than nothing. So.
Not. True.
2. My back.
Enough said.
3. Christmas. I
love Christmas, but my family seems to put such an ugly spin on it that each
year it gets harder and harder to find the simple joy of it. Presents are
banished as being a pain, get togethers are a chore (for them), and the singleness
thing gets to me while I try to pretend it doesn’t. I am determined not to succumb
to any of this nonsense this year.
4. Watching my
son struggle. It was a year of mourning Phil and mourn he did. And while that
is a good thing, it was hard for this Momma to watch. He is stronger for it and
he is starting to move forward again, but oh, gut wrenching to watch him go
through it.
5. My Mom's fall and subsequent brain surgery. Really, enough said.
So, all in all, my year has been good and God
has blessed me in many, many ways. As my next trip around the sun begins, I am
excited for the promises it holds. I think of the practical things I want to do
(new carpet for the house!) and the not so practical (a trip to Alaska!). But
more than anything, I want to make a difference for God. I want to deepen
existing friendships. I want to be more kind. I want to not sweat the small
stuff. I want to be gracious when faced with a difficult person. I want to
drive without involuntarily screeching, “Are you kidding me?!” I want my friends to not be sick.
I want Timber to not be such a
hound.
Well, we can’t have everything.
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